Friends - [10x17-18] - The Last One

The Last One: Part 1 [10.17][edit]

Rachel: Chick and the duck? Didn't they die—
Phoebe: —Dive. Yeah, they dove headfirst into fun on the farm.

[the doctor just revealed that the second baby is arriving]
Monica: I'm sorry. Who should be along in a what now?

Doctor: You do know it's twins, right?
Chandler: Oh, yeah. These are the faces of two people in the know!

Chandler: What do we do?
Monica: What do you mean "what do we do"?
Chandler: Twins! Twins!
Monica: Chandler, you're panicking.
Chandler: Uh-huh! Join me, won't you?

Ross: Okay, awkward question, the hospital knows you took two, right?

Monica: What if the person who adopts the other one is horrible?
Chandler: What if it's not? What if it's a king?
Monica: [sarcastically] Yeah, because I hear the king is looking to adopt.

Chandler: Have fun in church camp!

Chandler: Next time, can I say breathe?
Monica: No! The last time you did, you said it like Dracula and it scared her!

Chandler: [while Erica is giving birth] Is it really that bad?
Erica: Uh-huh. I think it's time to kick you in the nuts and see which is worse!

Monica: I don't care if it's two babies. I don't care if it's three babies. I don't care if the entire cast of Eight Is Enoughcomes out of there!

Monica: We decided to name the baby girl, Erica.
Erica: Hey, that's just like my name!
Monica: Son of a gun, it is.

Joey: What kinds are they?
Monica: This is a boy and that's a girl.
Chandler: Yeah, her name's Erica.
Joey: Hey, that pregnant girl's name was Erica.
Chandler: Yeah, it's a shame you two never spent more time together.

The Last One: Part 2 [10.18][edit]

[Phoebe and Ross are driving to John F. Kennedy Airport to find Rachel. Phoebe calls Rachel and tries to convince her to get off the plane in an attempt to stall her]
Rachel: [Rachel's cell phone rings] Hello?
Phoebe: Rachel! Oh good! Hey, by the way, did you just get on the plane?
Rachel: Yeah.
Phoebe: [to Ross:] For what it's worth, we would've caught her if we were at the right airport.
Ross: [sarcastically] Yay...
Phoebe: Uh, Rach, hang on. [Phoebe holds out her phone to Ross, but he refuses to talk and repeatedly mouths "No!"]
Rachel: Phoebe, is everything okay?
Phoebe: Um... actually, no. No, y-you have to get off the plane.
Rachel: What, why?
Phoebe: I have this feeling that something's wrong with it. Something is wrong with the left phalange.
[A passenger sitting beside her has been eavesdropping on her conversation and shows signs of worry.]
Worried passenger: Um, ahem, what was that?
Rachel: Oh! That was just my crazy friend. She told me I should get off the plane because she had a "feeling" that there was something wrong with the "left phalange".
Worried passenger: Okay, uh, that doesn't sound good.
Rachel: Oh, I wouldn't worry about it. She's always coming up with stuff like this and you know what? She's almost never right.
Worried passenger: But she is sometimes?
Rachel: Well?
[The man gets up from his seat and starts gathering his luggage from the overhead compartment.]
Flight attendant: Excuse me, sir? Where you going?
Worried passenger: Okay, I have to off this plane, okay? Uh, her friend has a feeling something's wrong with the left phalange.
Rachel: [to flight attendant] Could I get some peanuts?
2nd passenger: What's wrong with the plane?
Flight attendant: There's nothing wrong with the plane...
Worried passenger: The left phalange.
Flight attendant: There's no phalange!
Worried passenger: Oh my...! This plane doesn't even have a phalange!
2nd passenger: Well I'm not flying on it.
Flight attendant: Ma'am, please sit down!
3rd passenger: What's going on?!
Worried passenger: We're all getting off, there is no phalange!
Rachel: Ah! This is ridiculous! I-- [she sees the passengers leave the plane and decides to leave as well] Yeah, okay.

[After failing to convince Rachel to get off the plane, Ross heads to his apartment in despair and finds a message from Rachel on his answering machine.]
Rachel: Ross? Hi, it's me. I just got back on the plane and I just feel awful. That is so not how I wanted things to end with us. It's just that I... wasn't expecting to see you and then all of the sudden, you're there and saying these things and... now I'm just sitting here and thinking of all the stuff I should have said and I didn't. I mean, I didn't even get to tell you that I love you too. Because of course I do. I love you... I love you... I love you... what am I doing? I love you. Oh, I've gotta see you. I've gotta get off this plane.
Ross: Oh, my god!
Rachel[to flight attendant] Okay, e-excuse me--
Flight attendant: Ma'am, please sit down!
Rachel: No, I'm sorry, I'm really sorry, but I need to get off the plane, okay? I needed to tell someone that I love them.
Flight attendant: Ma'am, I can't let you off the plane.
Ross[listening to the conversation] Let her off the plane!!
Flight attendant: I am afraid you are gonna have to take a seat.
Rachel: Oh, please miss, you don't understand!
Ross: Try to understand!!
Rachel: Oh, come on, miss, isn't there any way that you could just let me off the-- [the message cuts before Rachel finishes her sentence]
Ross: No, no!! Oh, my god, did she get off the plane? Did she get off the plane?
Rachel[coming into room] I got off the plane.
Ross: You got off the plane.
[they passionately make out]
Rachel: I do love you.
Ross: I love you, too, and I am never letting you go again.
Rachel: Okay, because this is where I want to be. Okay, no more of this, I don't wanna mess this up again.
Ross: Me either, okay, we are done being stupid.
Rachel: It's you and me, all right, this is it? You and me, this is it.
Ross : This is it. Unless we're on a break.
[awkward pause]
Ross[to himself] Don't make jokes now...

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